Robin Williams and Suicide, Addiction and Mental Illness

I'm starting to get angry as I hear all the comments surrounding the "sudden" death of Robin Williams. Suicide is suspected and the ignorant comments scare me.

With all the media coverage the last decade regarding mental health issues have we learned nothing?

Depression is an equal opportunity disorder. It touches Oscar-winning comedians and the guy next door. It doesn't matter if you are rich or poor, ugly or pretty, etc.

"If only he had gotten help" was one of the many comments that made my blood boil. HELP doesn't always help!


Reports are that recently Robin Williams recognized his depression was severe. He checked himself into rehab for his struggle with alcoholism. Sadly this recent rehab attempt didn't work.

As someone who battles depression knows, it isn't always about getting "help". Also, getting "help" isn't that easy.

There are a combination of factors that need to fall into place in order for "help" to be successful.

Underneath it all it comes down to the person who is being treated. You can go to the most expensive, highly recommended treatment center but at the end of the day, sometimes the demons win.

I wish it didn't sound that cut and dry, but sadly sometimes it is.

Robin Williams' legacy on film will last forever. His life, as many have commented, was NOT a waste. He left us laughing but with a tear in our eyes because no one was able to save him from the demons that eventually won.

Coping with Triggers

Sometimes panic happens and there doesn't seem to be a reason why. Other times you know the triggers but avoiding them is sometimes not easy.

I'm making a lot of changes in my life lately and the last thing I need is to have to deal with is negativity and people who push my buttons. Unfortunately some people you cannot avoid.

It is work to learn how to cope with anxiety. I take it day by day. It's those things you cannot control that can throw a wrench into your progress.

Avoidance is unrealistic. There are some things that happen that you have to deal with. So how do you cope when others' behaviors threaten your sanity?

Stop. Breathe. Use the mantras that work for you. Repeat repeat repeat!

Sooner or later the panic will pass and you will regain control over the thoughts in your mind.

I avoid overwhelming myself and instead I focus on the moment. I try to avoid the "what ifs". That is easier to do when you just simply focus on the moment and remember that any icky feelings will pass. Don't allow the panic to consume you and don't allow the negative thoughts to multiply.

Explore how you are feeling but do not obsess about it. Negative people can only drag you down if you let them.

I firmly believe that after a while if someone in your life keeps insisting upon bringing you down with them, maybe it is time to reconsider their importance in your life.

Refuse to be abused by others' anger, disappointment in themselves or misplaced guilt. How you react to situations is totally under your control. The panic will want to control you but it doesn't have to. Don't let it consume you. Fight back by not allowing it to take space in your mind.

Panic doesn't have to win.

Helping Your Adult Child in Crisis

Mental illness most often can manifest in the late teen to early 20s. This is most heart-wrenching for the parents because once their teenager turns the magic age of 18, a parent is powerless.

Laws regarding mental health have changed over the last decade or more, giving the patient more rights to avoid abuse by the system.

Unfortunately the system that is protecting the rights of the patient is often enabling patients who need help from receiving it.

You cannot force someone to get mental health treatment unless they are proven to be a danger to themselves or others. Proving this is time-consuming and often the person will act out at the risk of their own well-being or someone elses'.

Being a parent of a young adult is not easy. Not many young adults are financially stable enough to live on their own and they often stay home until they have either finished their education or gotten settled in a career. Meanwhile the once-together young adult can exhibit signs of depression or other mental illnesses and the parent cannot do much to help their "child".

Early adulthood is when most mental illness issues come to the surface. There might have been some signs during the teen years but many parents chalk it up to moody teenage behavior. Many don't take it seriously because they are uninformed or just unwilling to face the idea that their child is less than "perfect".

What can a parent do to help their young adult child when it becomes obvious that their mental health is at issue?

The first thing to do is try talking to your adult child about their behavior. Depending upon the kind of relationship you have, you might be able to get them to see that they need to speak to an outsider about how they are feeling.

Counselling should be the first step along with a visit to your family doctor to rule out medical causes for how he/she is feeling.

If he/she is not receptive to the idea or reacts with anger, assure them that it is perfectly okay for them to have mixed feelings about seeking help. Pull up a website like NAMI which has tons of information about depression and other common mental illnesses. They have links to guides for where to find treatment and what to expect.

Most of all, don't give up!

You might not be able to force your adult child into treatment but you can be supportive and active in trying to get them to accept help.

Don't look the other way. Don't assume he/she will "snap out of it". You have to deal with this. This is your child even though he/she is now legally an adult.

Consequences of his/her actions can affect the rest of his/her life. You want to make sure that you do all that you can to get them to accept the idea that right now they are not in control of their emotions and they need help to get through this time in their life.

Never lose hope.

NAMI also has great information for parents whose adult child is resistant to treatment. You might need to go down that road of tough love but doing nothing will only bring guilt later on. Don't be ashamed and don't be afraid to talk to others about what your family is going through. No one is immune from mental illness.

Who Becomes a Drug Addict?

Today the world lost another celebrity and the whispers are it was drug-related. Philip Seymore Hoffman was found dead in his NYC apartment possibly due to his use of heroin.

Many people ask why do people do a drug like heroin which can kill you after one use? Why do people turn to drugs at all?

Of course I am no doctor or expert but from what I have seen many turn to drugs out of desperation to ease the pain of just living. Undiagnosed or mistreated mood disorders are often common amongst those who turn to drugs. I've said it before and I will say it again- the mental health treatment in this country is seriously lacking.

Treatment is time-consuming, expensive and not always easy to come by. Mental illness can strike anyone. Rich or poor, fat or skinny, black or white, young or old.

People who have been living with a mood disorder know the frustration of the journey. Many of us have also self-medicated. Those who are in denial of their illness turn to drugs which is dangerous. Even those who admit they have a substance abuse issue live dangerously either by still using or struggling to stay clean.

What is the answer?

That's tough.

We need more quality care accessible to all. We need understanding from others that mental illnesses are real and treatable.

We need to be more compassionate and knowledgeable and less judgmental.

Maybe it is our society that keeps us all on this hamster wheel that keeps us living stressful lives.

It is so easy to say that we are just going to slow down but in reality many of us cannot.

There has to be a way to fix this problem that plagues us so greatly.

Drug addiction is rarely seen without an underlying cause.

How to Treat Your Anxiety

No one needs to suffer from anxiety. There is help but sometimes it takes time to figure out just what to do.

Traditional anxiety treatment often consists of your doctor prescribing an anti-depressant. This will help to relieve the symptoms of anxiety but in the long-term, what does it solve?

Anxiety can happen because of life stressors and often there are "reasons" why you have become anxious. If you just take a pill daily you are ignoring the reason for the anxiety.

Another "cause" of anxiety can be a medical condition. Hormonal imbalances can cause anxiety symptoms as well as other medical conditions. Not treating the underlying problem is putting a band-aid on the problem.

Non-traditional treatments like acupuncture and massage can help anxiety symptoms. Chances are good that your doctor is not going to recommend them. Acupuncture can help to balance you out and often allow you to release the emotions that are bottled up.

The first course of seeking treatment should be a blood test to rule out any abnormalities. Someone with a history of thyroid problems might just be in need of a medication adjustment.

From there you can figure out how to best treat your anxiety. If you just get on an anti-depressant you are not really treating your anxiety.

The most effective treatment for anxiety is to personalize it. Your body is not like anyone elses'.

Step 1 is to find out what your body is trying to tell you by getting your blood tested.

Step 2 is to "fix" any deficiencies that your blood work shows.

Step 3 is to discuss with your doctor how to cope with any anxiety symptoms you might be having.

Sometimes medication is helpful short-term to cope with symptoms while you work on getting your body back to optimum health.

Coping methods could be stress-reducing techniques like breathing exercises, meditation, massage and talk therapy.

No one needs to suffer from anxiety. It is a process to "fix" it but it is better than suffering through panic attacks.

Fighting the Isolation of Being Mentally Ill- Teens with Bipolar

Fitting in when you are growing into adulthood can be tough enough but when you are also coping with a mood disorder, life can sometimes be lonely.

Teenagers can be self-absorbed and many are not compassionate to the needs of a friend who suffers from a mood disorder. Unless a teen lives with it, most teens can get tired of an emotionally needy friend.

When you suffer from a mood disorder you are often just trying to survive the mood swings and you may not be the best friend you can be.

A teen with a mood disorder often doesn't realize how straining it can be to deal with their ups and downs. Their erratic behavior can be a turn-off and sometimes their actions can cause the break-up of friendships. A teen suffering from depression often isolates themselves from the world and then is sad because they feel so alone.

As the parent of a teen with bipolar, it saddens me how lonely my teenager is at times. The depression usually causes him to isolate himself from everyone. At other times he is bored because he lacks the "normal" teenage social life. Many times it seems like he looks to me for entertainment.

Being an adult with adult responsibilities sometimes I just want a break from it all. I fight my own demons at times and getting "me" time just isn't possible with an emotionally fragile teenager.

I remember my own teen years and although I wouldn't want him to emulate them, I do wish that he had half the adventures I did.

I don't long for "normal" but I do hope for something more than he has right now.

Learning how to find your place in the world is essential for every teenager. You do this by socialization, getting your first job, having your first date, etc. My teen is so far behind in the "normal" teenage experiences.

It is a much different world for today's teens. With social media/networking, many teens form strong bonds with people they have never set eyes on. Even teens with a so-called "normal" social life choose to spend their time communicating through texting instead of old-fashioned conversation.

It is so easy to get caught up in technology. I fear that it does cause many of our teenagers to lack learning the social skills to grow into healthy adulthood. Imagine the teen who has a mood disorder and instead of being forced to be out there in the real world instead gets caught up in the cyber world.

A parent needs to push them to put the phone down and get out there. How many parents actually can devote the time to policing their teen into a healthier way of life?

As a parent who has tried, I admit that I am not always successful. Time demands keep me for putting up a fight some days.

The challenge of being a mom to a teenager with bipolar is great. Hope is something that I never lose- no matter what.

I can't.

Someday maturity will catch up and that inner fight will burn. My teen will choose to find his place in this world and will overcome or learn to cope with the symptoms of bipolar.

The future might be different than what I expect it will be. Our children are growing up in a much different world than we did. For all the good technology has given us it has also given us bad. Finding the balance and growing up healthy is more of a challenge than ever. For a teen with bipolar it is a much bigger challenge.

In the meantime I encourage my teen to physically get together with friends. I urge him to join after-school clubs and look for his first job.

I encourage him to get outside and exercise even if I have to go along for the walk. (it doesn't hurt me but it sure is tough to make the time)

Balance is the key and if I can teach him to find that healthy balance, hopefully he will grow into an adult with better coping skills to handle a life with bipolar.

Coping with the High Cost of Treatment

Being without health insurance is a scary thing for most people but when you have a mental illness and rely upon daily medication, it is really scary.

The good news is that many pharmaceutical companies are sympathetic to patients and offer several different programs to help. Even if you have insurance but your prescription coverage is lacking, there are programs for you.

The fear many patients have is not being able to afford their care. This is the biggest reason why many skip treatment, cancel therapy appointments and often go off needed medication. For someone with a mood disorder this can set you back in your treatment.

When you find yourself without insurance, the first thing to do is get busy on the Internet. Write down the medications you take and Google them. Go to the pharmaceutical company's website and check out what programs they have to help with the cost of your prescription drugs.

The next thing to do is to talk to your doctor. Explain your financial situation and if you are currently stable, see if you can put off your appointment for medication management. If you cannot, see if your doctor will charge you on a sliding scale until you are able to get new health insurance.

Clinics are another option but many times they have waiting lists of 6 weeks of longer. As soon as you lose your coverage, call up and get on that list!

If you are secure with a good therapist, have a discussion with them about your financial situation. See what they can do to help you out. You will never know unless you ask.

Consistent treatment is essential for mental illness. Financial setbacks and lack of health insurance are stumbling blocks on the road to your wellness. Try and work through them so you don't suffer!

Addiction Knows No Boundaries

With the recent death of yet another celebrity addict, people on many news sites are making some very ignorant comments.

No one chooses to become an addict.

Today's world is one of great stress and the pharmaceutical companies have conditioned us to believe that we do not need to feel "sad", "depressed" or not "ourselves". They have a medication for it.

The problem is that many of these medications act as band-aids; they cover up the symptoms but never force us to explore the root of the problem.

In this case of anti-anxiety drugs and sleep aids, the danger is the addictive nature of them.

The other danger is how so many people who take these medications do not consider the fact that having a cocktail is mixing drugs.

ALCOHOL may be legal but it is a DRUG!

In my life it never ceases to amaze me how ignorant people are about drinking alcoholic beverages when they also have been prescribed an anti-depressant.

Alcohol messes with your brain chemistry and ruins the affect the pharmaceutical drug has on you. The two do NOT mix.

It is not okay to have a drink every now and again and take anti-depressants, anti-anxiety medication or sleeping aids.

I don't believe that Whitney Houston intended to die. Whitney's usage of prescription drugs for anxiety, sleeping pills and alcohol put her at a higher risk for "accidents" to happen.

An accident did happen. Toxicology reports (although not complete yet) will most likely show that the combination of Xanax, Valium and alcohol led to her tragic death.

No one said life was easy. Stress can overpower us and sometimes we go to our doctor in desparation for help. We are prescribed help in the form of a pill which does come with a warning but no one fully can understand the addictive nature of these drugs until it is too late.

You may think that you can handle it; perhaps cut yourself off when you recognize there may be a problem but often that is not the case.

As your body gets used to Xanax or Valium, you need more of it to create the same affect. If you enjoy your wine along with your prescription you are living dangerously. Maybe you think that you have it all under control.

All you are doing is gambling with your life.

It is best not to even start taking these anti-anxiety drugs. I don't even think that prescription sleep aids are a good idea even though I myself suffer horrible bouts of insomnia.

There are much better ways to deal with the stresses in our lives. If you feel like you just cannot take it anymore (the stress), schedule an appointment with a therapist. Don't fill that prescription for a pharmaceutical fix.

It is far too easy to have it become a crutch that you cannot easily get rid of. It also can be deadly.

BiPolar - Over or Under Diagnosed?

Bipolar disorder is a mood disorder that seems to have become much more commonly diagnosed in recent years. It is also a disorder that can go undiagnosed because of the nature of the symptoms.

There are several different kinds of bipolar disorder but what defines bipolar is the extremes in moods from high highs (mania) to low lows (depression).

The truth is that mania feels good. The person is on top of the world and the behaviors that go along with this feeling of euphoria often cause reckless behavior. People do not usually seek medical help when they are feeling manic.

The other side of bipolar is the lows. The depressive symptoms can make a person feel suicidal and this is what often brings them to seek medical help. The psychiatrist only sees the person in a severely depressed mood and treats them with an anti-depressant. This will help them at first to cope with the depression symptoms, but as time goes by, the anti-depressant will actually make their manic episodes worsen. The depression will not be "fixed" either. A doctor who doesn't recognize that there are mood swings will increase the dosage of anti-depressant and the person will often continue the cycle of mood swings.

Diagnosing bipolar is difficult. It involves many visits to the psychiatrist and unfortunately, if those visits do not coincide with your mood swings and you do not verbalize these feelings, a doctor can easily miss that you have a form of bipolar.

This is most evident in children and teenagers. A psychiatrist who allows the parent to "speak" for the child is trusting that the parent's observations are correct and not biased or overly exaggerrated.

As a parent of a now-teenager, I have sat in psychiatrists' offices for years listening to my daughter either not verbalize her symptoms or seemingly forgetting how severe her moods often can be.

Over the years she has been diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, anxiety, depression, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, Attention Deficit Disorder, and now mild Bipolar II.

As a parent who has 20 years experience with psychiatrists, I am frustrated.

I have been paid to research, cite sources and write about mental illness and treatments. I do not have a degree in any medical field (aside from a certification in massage therapy) but I feel that I have enough knowledge to guide my daughter's treatment.

What disturbs me greatly is that my research and personal experience has shown me that often symptoms can be affected by a person's lifestyle. In my daughter's case, I know that she needs a structured schedule to stick to. If allowed to just do as she wants, during depressive episodes she will withdraw and literally spend most of her time sleeping or laying around.

Her diet is also an issue. Always a picky eater, her bloodwork shows that she has a Vitamin D deficiency. People with a deficiency can suffer from depression symptoms. Like many teens, her diet is deficient in many areas. There is a direct connection to her mental health.

Psychiatrists often poo-poo the idea that a vitamin deficiency can affect your mental well-being. Many instead will increase your medication instead of referring you to a nutritionist.

I call this the zombie affect. It is also putting a band-aid on a wound that needs stitches.

To sum it all up, bipolar disorder is not always easy to see and even when it is, the journey can be one full of frustration.

Patients need to educate themselves in order to ensure that they receive the correct diagnosis and treatment that is best for them.

Stress and Mental Illness

Stress is a killer but if you are also coping with a mental illness, it can make coping even tougher.

read about coping techniques here 

Going through treatment for conditions like anxiety can often produce more anxiety as you get to the bottom of what triggers your panic attacks. Learning a stress-reducing technique will only help your treatment and speed your recovery.

Developing a plan that works for you may take time. Some people find that setting aside even 15 minutes in the morning to quietly reflect through meditation can put their mind into a place where they can better cope through a stressful day.

For others, a daily exercise routine helps to keep them balanced.

Remember that we are all unique and what works for one person may not be what works for you. 

Try many techniques until you find one that is right for you and practice it daily. 

Your mental well-being will improve. Guaranteed!